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Curing cancer is a slap to the face of my dead brother-in-law.
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Havenât consulted a proper map yet, but Iâm missing both Dakotas, Nebraska, Kansas, New Mexico, Pennsylvania and Delaware⌠I think thatâs all thatâs missing.
Good one.
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I needed the map, and I was a maps kid. I completely missed the swath of Midwestern states.
I think thatâs why people in the know, just refer to them as âfly over statesâ
Well, but theyâve always been âflyover statesâ in your vernacular, and they truly are boring AF to fly overâŚor even to drive through.
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Inorite, when I was a wee sprog we climbed into the van in the Big Valley every other year to visit our SoDak kinfolk. Crossing Wyoming into Nebraska into SoDak is bad enoughâŚ
One year there was a big shindig for my Okie roots and we did the loop thru the Grand Canyon, into Oklahoma, did all that, and headed north to Ioway and then SoDak, doing the northern route back thru Jellystone, PotatoStan, and then down the PCH back to Cowsville where we lived in central CA. Not all flyover states, but certainly the mentality and visual interest thereof. My one memory of the OK jaunt was all us young cousins got official (looking) OU jerseys with our age on them, my #8 was for one Joe Washington who apparently was a big deal in the day.
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Dad, do trees poop?
Of course they do son. How do you think we get #2 pencils?
I was working on my quantum physics homework when my mom came barging inâŚ
I switched to porn because it was easier to explain.
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(moved)
The fairy says âI will give you what you most desire if you do someone elseâs job for a day.â
The professor says âIâll be an elementary school teacher. What can be so hard about teaching a bunch of 6-year-olds how to read?â so he is teleported into a classroom. After a few minutes, all the kidsâ screaming gets to his nerves, so he throws all his supplies and gives up.
The C.E.O says âIâll be a waiter. All you do is carry food back and forth. Thisâll be a breezeâ so he is teleported to a restaurant. After about an hour, all the annoying customers drive him insane, so he smashes his plates on the ground and gives up.
The janitor says âIâll be an artistâ so he is transported to an art facility. He glues all the classroom supplies and shattered plates to a canvas, then sells it for a million dollars.
The fairy asks the janitor how he was so clever.
The janitor says "I got a masters degree in art.â
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Not gonna make another thread just for one high school gag.
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If any Trump supporters see this, they will view high school as higher education. We would have also accepted the Literary thread.
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A kid asks his mom âMom, what does âan Apple a day keeps the doctors awayâ mean?â
Mom says, âAh, my dear son, it means that if you play games on your Apple phone everyday, you will never get your PhDâ
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