Liturgical LOLs

Modern day Christianity

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Well, he could do as Trump does, and give somebody else’s lunch to the homeless guy.

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President Trump walks into a bar

He spots Mitt Romney in a corner.

President Trump: “They told me I’d find you here, but why is a Mormon in a bar?”

Mitt: “Nobody expects it, so I can meditate in peace.”

Trump: “Well, I’m here because I urgently need your help. You see, illegals have built massive ladder factories and are easily climbing over my Great Wall by the millions. They even have a religion about ladders, for God’s sake! Mitt, I need YOU to intervene.”

Mitt: “That’s horrible, Mr. President, but it’s not something I can help you with.”

Trump: "But isn’t ‘Mormon’ a nickname for your church, the Church of Ladder Day Saints?”

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https://i.chzbgr.com/full/8456974336/hA6ED0134.gif

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Who killed Jesus and then said "Aaaar, Matey”?

Pontius Pirate

Sign of the times?

https://scontent-sea1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/16406784_10212453795838745_1430716879441335822_n.jpg?oh=4323230eac9c5c6479cdacbbd0fc764d&oe=594847DF

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This is a baklava wearing a balaclava while playing a balalaika on black lava.

OMG! I am so damn blind that I thought this was the literary laughs thread.

DOH!

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1 Recommendation of 3377

A guy goes into the confessional booth after years being away from the Church.

He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down.

There’s a fully equipped bar with crystal glasses, the best vestry wine, Guinness on tap, cigars and liqueur chocolates nearby, and on the wall a fine photographic display of buxom ladies who appear to have mislaid their garments.

He hears a priest come in:

“Father, forgive me for it’s been a very long time since I’ve been to confession and I must admit that the confessional box is much more inviting than it used to be”.

The priest replies, "That’s my side, you idiot”.

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https://scontent-sea1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/17342537_268285513621562_7468956385630229541_n.jpg?oh=eeaa34cb7235c6cec72fa69f2ffa0b66&oe=596846D4

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A buddhist goes to a barber. After his haircut is finished he asks about the price and the barber says for a man of faith there is no cost. The next day the barber finds a gold statue of buddha on the steps of his shop.

A priest goes to the barber to get his hair cut. After his haircut is finished he asks about the price and the barber says for a man of faith there is no cost. The next day the barber finds a well woven cloak on the steps of his shop.

A rabbi goes to the barber to get his hair cut. After his haircut is finished he asks about the price and the barber says for a man of faith there is no cost. The next day he finds a dozen rabbi on the steps of his shop.

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